Updates

I haven't written in a while, just hurts so bad and I've been trying physical therapy for my knee and neck injuries and surgery. Unfortunately, my insurance will only let me have three more visits this year and it's only mid-July. I don't know how I'll survive without it.

The EMG results came back as abnormal, naturally, when has anything done to me been normal? Always been the Abby normal person. (OK, so I might have seen Young Frankenstein a few too many times, but it fits, so why not borrow it?) I saw my regular doctor last Friday and he went over the EMG results with me and let me know I have another debilitating injury. While the knee surgeon was fixing a torn meniscus, my doctor feels that the surgeon cut the nerve in my leg that controls my calf and toes. Why Me? My doctor has been a physician for many decades and has treated hundreds of thousands of patients in his years, but I am the first one he's seen with this injury. It's that rare. Yeah, that's my life. He showed me the nerve and all it does in his medical book. He was stunned I hadn't been shown it and told what happens next. What can I say? I'm a medical marvel. :(

I go back to the neck surgeon at the end of the month and we'll see if there's anything else that can be done. No appointment with the knee surgeon until next month. He told me he can't do anything about the nerve damage in my lower leg except give me more pills. They don't help. He offered to double the dose. Woo Hoo! Double the dose of a medicine that doesn't work? Gee thanks! This is from a orthopedic surgeon. The man has 12 years of specialized schooling, plus several years of residency and that's all he can do about a mistake he made? How about admitting it and apologizing. I know he's afraid I'll sue and win. There's no other way the nerve could have been damaged. It was working before he did the knee surgery and now I have nerve damage?

I am no longer able to work. It killed me when I was told I was no longer able to work. I had been a newspaper/magazine reporter for 20 years. It was a huge part of my identity. When I was made a staff reporter for a large newspaper in my region of Northwestern PA, it was one of the best days of my life. I was a wife, mother of one daughter with a son on the way and had my dream job. I did my best to work daily and take my monthly turn on Saturday night. I wound up in the ER far too often after covering a lengthy court day or other long days working. The day after I used my last sick day, they called me into the editor's office and fired me. That was a massive blow and I cried the whole 45-minute drive home and well into the night. I was taking time off to try and heal when I got called by another newspaper I had worked as a stringer (write articles as they need) for them for another decade or more. I covered the beginning court case of a gruesome murder and even dug up the best friend of the accused murderer and had an exclusive interview with him. The editor was thrilled! The police hadn't even found him yet.

Will write more later about our local firemen's annual parade and carnival that was last week. Also about have my niece Taryn. Was so wonderful having her all to ourselves. She's 9 and such a sweet girl! We couldn't love her more if she were our blood niece.

Another EMG ( Electrocuting my body) test today

I was expecting to go to the dentist this morning when the phone rang at 9 a.m. It was the doctor's secretary who travels from Pittsburgh to do EMGs for the residents of Elk County since we don't have a specialist here. I was scheduled to have the test next week, but didn't hesitate and took the available slot this afternoon. I then called the dentist and rescheduled. EMGs involve sticking needles in your muscles and nerves and zapping them with electricity to see if they are damaged or blocked. This will be my third one.

For those who don't know, I've had trouble with my left leg for months before the surgery in February to repair the torn meniscus and it has only gotten worse since then. Also my lower back has hurt for many, many years. I had an appointment with the knee surgeon last week and he feels that the pain problem is I have a nerve damaged or blocked somewhere between my lower back and calf of my left leg, but it has nothing to do with his surgery. (Naturally) He wanted me to have the EMG to find out where the problem is. It might require further surgery. Great, just what I don't want. He put me on nerve pain medicine. I take it at night and it knocks me out. Once I take it, I have maybe a half hour, then I'm finished until the morning. Then I'm exhausted all day as well.

Today's test was even more painful than the two I had done on my left shoulder and left arm. When he stabbed the needle into my thigh and pushed with all his night and zapped me, I thought I was going to lose what's left of my mind. Even worse, he had to do that particular one twice. It could have been three times, because by then I was almost passed out. The pain was incredible and I wouldn't wish it on anyone but my absolute worst enemy and she deserves even more pain after what she did.

I asked him what the results were and he couldn't tell me. I so hate that. Why not just let me know? They are MY test results from MY body aren't they? Anyhow, he said they would be sent to the doctor on Thursday and I should expect a call from the doctor next week. I don't have an appointment with him for at least 4 or 5 more weeks and told him that was too long for me to wait. Patience is not a virtue with which I was blessed. He said not to worry, he was sure I would get a call next week. What would you think that meant? Now I'm sure there is a damaged nerve somewhere and that has me freaking out. I hate this! If the surgeon hasn't called me by Friday of next week, I'll call my family doctor and see if he can get the results and tell me if there's something to worry about.

I'm so tired of waiting for the next shoe to all!

Will this winter ever end?

As a infamous movie weatherman trapped forever in Punxsutawney once moaned, "This winter is never going to end." I find myself feeling the same way. I realize it's only mid-February, but I'm already sick to death of being cold. Our pipes have frozen half a dozen times already and I have to keep a heater in the laundry room or the washing machine won't work.

Everyone has to leave the house 20 minutes earlier than usual to dig their cars out of the mounds of snow they have been buried in. Hubby and daughter have auto-starters for their cars, but it doesn't help that much. My son has a manual shift car, so he doesn't have a starter. I start both cars when I come downstairs to pack lunch boxes and feed the cats (not necessarily in that order. The three cats are very insistent that they be fed before anything else is done. They have very loud meows and scream in harmony.)

I hate walking outside and rarely go anywhere except to the doctor or for medical tests. This Wednesday is yet another MRI of my neck and head. The doctor is trying to see if there is a reason in that area that my left arm keeps going numb. They tried to do this test last week, but I freaked out and they couldn't do the test. I'm very claustrophobic and it has gotten worse as I get older and sicker. Being put in that tube, it feels like I'm in a coffin. The loud banging from the machine is awful! I also need to have an MRI of my left knee to see if the meniscus is torn. If it is, the orthopedic doctor said it's an easy scope surgery to fix it. If it isn't torn, then it's probably just arthritis and nothing will help that. I can wear a knee brace or get steroid shots in there every six months. There's no way those shots are going to happen. I go with Randy when he gets those shots and if it hurts him enough that he shows it, then I would be on the floor, curled dupe in the fetal position crying my eyes out. Not going to happen! Besides, I tried those shots for my shoulder and ended up needing surgery anyhow. NO MORE NEEDLES!!! The changing pressure continues to cause horrid migraines.

Lets hope that rotten rodent in Punxsutawney is wrong and we will be an early spring.

More Surgery

Amazingly enough, this time it's not me having the surgery. My daughter, Arielle, received more than her stunning good looks from me, she also inherited the painful lipomas that grow all over my arms, legs and spine. Thankfully, hers aren't as large or as many as I get. She had a small one removed from the top of her left knee yesterday.

She goes back to the doctor tomorrow to make sure the wound is healing and then the doctor will decide when she's allowed to go back to work and when the stitches will be removed. She's not happy missing work for the 2 1/2 days. She's use to working all day sorting parts for several automobile companies. She has started paying for her own expenses (insurance and cellphone) and it makes her feel so good to be able to do that. The first day she gave her dad her month expense money, the smile on her face could literally light up the world. I'm so proud of her! She said she finally feels like an adult being able to pay for her expenses. She's 21 years old and this is the first time she's had a job that paid enough to do more than put gas in her car.

Rather than spending every penny she earns on junk, she's saving up for the trip to Mexico we're planning for at the end of August. It's the trip we've been hoping to take for several years since my son's girlfriend's parents live in Tijuana. I can't wait to meet them. Her mother and I write on Facebook and have talked on Skype before. It feels like I've known her forever.

I'll post a photo or two of the surgery when I figure out how to move them from my cellphone to my Surface 2. Night ll.

Nerve Conduction Torture Test

Yesterday was the dreaded nerve conduction test that I have been worried, well scared is a better word, about for the past few weeks. I had one done two years ago next month and it was just as painful as I remember. I wasn't able to sleep at all the night before.

It started out with a little electrode being placed on my arms and zapping me with electricity. My hands curled on their own with each touch. All I pictured was Frankenstein lying on the slab, covered with the sheet and his hand starting to jerk after being zapped with lightning. Once the doctor got the information he needed from that torture, out came the needles. He put them in at certain points and then even more electricity. It has changed my thoughts on the death penalty. While I completely believe in the death penalty, electricity as a way of death, I feel, is now cruel and unusual punishment. When a person is sentenced to death, it should be painless or it should be done in the exact same way as the person they murdered died, that should be the rule for anything who kills an innocent child.

Dr. Baker is a nice man and we spent the time talking about old-time movies like Casablanca, Frankenstein (with Boris Karloff), The Wolfman (Lon Cheney), The Invisible Man (Claude Raines) and of course The Rocky Horror Picture Show. By the time we were done, he was actually singing The Time Warp!

He said I was a good patient and didn't even fight. What use is it to fight? I had to have the tests to see what's wrong with my arm. He said he'll have the results sent to my doctor on Monday. I'm worried that it's carpel tunnel syndrome for sure. I'll need a MRI to see if my rotator cuff is torn, the muscle damaged and my elbow messed up. He even laughed that I'd be a terrible poker player because all my feelings show on my face. He could see how badly my arm hurt and what the test was doing to me. I was wearing my red contacts and it took him about 20 minutes for him to decide to ask about them. He thought they were like the Frost Giants in Thor. I had to explain they were really vampire eyes. That's when our talk about monsters, Gods, the paranormal and movies really started.

Like most doctors know, I'm a different type of patient and even he admitted it when I explained what migraines feel like. I think the person who wrote about the birth of Athena was experiencing a migraine. Zeus was feeling stabbing and banging in his head and it was so bad he couldn't take it anymore. He had his head cracked open and Athena sprang out, fully dressed in battle gear with a sword and shield. The stabbing was her sword and the banging was her shield hitting his brain. That's exactly how I feel during the level 10+ migraines I get constantly. I spend so much time around doctors and nurses, that I no longer have even a bit of "awe" for them. I realize they are just people with a little more education. Some doctors appreciate that I treat them like equals, while others get very furious that I don't bow down to their God complex.

I asked him about a bionic arm transplant, but again, he can't help with that. They don't have them available. Maybe someday? My next doctor visit is at the end of the month to an orthopedic surgeon to check out my knee and now my arm. I'm sure he'll want MRI's of off them to make sure he can see if there are any tears, rips, etc.. I'm not thrilled at the thought of having another surgery or three, but I can't keep going on with the pain. I'm use to living in constant pain, but this is even worse than ever and I'm not sure I can tolerate it much longer. I cry myself to sleep every night and quite often through the day as well.

As a treat, we stopped at Four Sons' Texas Hotdogs. Trevor loves their slovaki dinner and I always get their fish dinner and share it with Arielle. They are beyond delicious and it's a HUGE piece of fish. Last night, Randy tried a tiny bit, then he wanted a little more. I think he'll order the fish next time. :) He and Arielle took hotdogs in their lunchboxes for their lunches today.

Until next time

Happy New Year 2014

Here it is, another new year has started. Sure hope it's better than the last one because it really sucked royally! I think I spent more time with doctors, either in offices or in hospitals, than I did with my family. That has to change this year. I only have 3 scheduled appointments so far this month. I go on Thursday for a very horrid nerve test. The doctor inserts electrodes inside left my arm (where a lot of the current pain is, aside from the never-ending migraines), then will zap me with electricity. If you've never had it done, I suggest you skip the offer. The last time I had this torture er test done was three years ago. I can still remember ever minute.

My shoulder is still killing me. Actually, the entire left arm is ready to be exchanged for a bionic one. That would be nice. At least the pain would stop!

I'll post more after we get the results of the tests. Think happy thoughts. I can't take much more pain.

G